By guest author Harumura - 春村
Lucid dreaming seems to be still such a niche topic that I find myself surrounded by people who either have “no interest in it cause it's a waste of time as dreams are not real and what's the point then”; or have never even heard about it or just would think I'm weird and I don't talk to them about it.
Indeed, there are very few people, a couple of people to be specific, who know about my interest and practice of LD. One of those people even has shown concern, would I be to dig in too deep into the realms of lucidity, about my prospective sanity when I've mentioned that tactile sensations are exactly the same in waking life as in a LD and how fascinating that is to me. They worry I might become unable to distinguish between reality and the dream world.
This, of course, comes from someone who doesn't even remember their dreams and therefore, doesn't know that the real world and the dream world are qualitatively quite different in many ways. I assure them that, in case of doubt I will not do anything stupid like jumping from a rooftop and that I'll limit my behaviour to physical reality standards, thank you very much (for your unnecessary concern).
So I turned to books, videos, pod-casts, etc. to access information on the topic. I know there are online forums where one can “talk” to other lucid dreamers and express your own opinions, but I have never actively participated in those. I've always been more of a receptive type of participant.
In listening and reading, naturally I guess, my own opinion and reflections on how my own experience compares to that of those who I was reading or watching started to come up to the surface and with it the need to share them and discuss them with other dreamers. So an impulse to write a blog started to raise its timid head within the confines of my mind.
In observing a lot of those who put some kind of lucid dreaming material out there, I was kind of annoyed with how quick some of them were to do generalizations and talk about personal experience as if it was set rules that apply to all. Even more annoyed when those stating those as “facts set in stone” had been doing this for like two days. “What the heck do they really know?” was the thought that most often would pop up in my head. Also a lot of assumptions and actions based on those assumptions, and generalizations drawn from those actions that stem from assumptions that only lead to the wrong conclusions. I often found myself thinking: “People rush too much, they are so eager to act as experts too soon”.
I guess the above is a product of our society, where everything has to be done now and quickly, with as little effort as possible, and where people want to be masters before they even try to be a disciple.
From all of this a conflict arises: between my urge to write and that voice that was warning me that if doing so too soon, I would end up becoming one of those I was judging. So I waited. Telling myself that what I had to share was not substantial enough, experienced enough to be worth sharing with others. Not yet. Don't rush like so many.
Another issue was a lot of the material I found online made too much emphasis on the techniques, and on controlling the dream. Very text-book like, heartless, stale, barren. How is this possible, when our minds are one of, if not the most intimate of our “possessions”?. This is another product of our society's approach to everything: being productive, what can I get out of it? How can I profit?
My way of profiting from lucid dreaming doesn't appeal too much to the ego. It's not about instant gratification. Don't get me wrong: it's not either all serious and deep. There is also a very light-hearted and joyful side to it, with a great sense of humour that makes me laugh out loud at times.
On the other extreme of the spectrum were those sources with the all-is-love-and-fluffy-bunnies approach, making vague and outlandish claims that sounded very far-fetched and unrealistic to me. I could only stand a few seconds of those before I moved on to something else.
There were also a few gems, which strike just the right balance and I treasure those and I'm so grateful for them.
So, if I were to write about lucid dreaming how should I do it? That was the first question. Well, to begin with I am no expert, so I will stay clear from stating things like: “this is how you should do such and such technique” or, “this IS the best technique” or “this IS what happens in such and such scenario...” you get the idea, right? I'll just write in first person, sharing my own experience and not making generalizations.
Now the follow up questions were: is it worth it for others to read about a particular individual's experience?. Why would they be interested in my experience?Am I being arrogant in thinking that I have something to say? Where is this impulse to “share” coming from? Is it my ego's need to “be someone”, to feel important?
And then, a more delicate issue: How much to share? What is safe and/or appropriate to share? Have I grown a thick enough skin to endure possible attacks and destructive criticism (we all know how ruthless the internet can be); or being absolutely ignored and have all the time and effort I put into writing just go to waste?
With this battle going on in my head for quite a while, one night, I decided to incubate a dream that would answer the question: should I or should I not start a blog on dreaming related topics?. That night I had the following dream: (transcribed from my dream journal)
I'm not in this dream at all. Not even as a witness. This dream plays like a movie in my head. There is a man busy in a working place (maybe an office of some sort). He receives a phone call. There has been an accident somewhere else in the building. Furniture has collapsed on a woman who is his colleague or his female alter-ego. So he runs to where the woman is, to help. He has to crack her chest open to save her. The phone caller said to him: “you have to do it! . If you don't open her chest to let the fluids out, she'll suffocate and die”. The woman also says: “you have to do it!”. He has a radial saw or grinder. He has to use it to cut open her chest, but be careful not to go too deep. Stop right at the bone (spine). If he completely cuts through, he'll kill her. He is very concerned, because of the pain he will cause her by cutting; so he doesn't want to do it. She insists: “It's the only way to save me. There's not much time before it's too late. DO IT!”. He cuts, and the crack, right at the heart level opens her chest's skin and muscle like a curtain. From there, a waterfall of pale blue, clean water pours downwards and out of her and she is saved.
About the Author:
Harumura - 春村 - Having lived in four different countries (Spain, Canada, United Kingdom and Japan) and speaking three different languages, Harumura identifies herself only as female, human and citizen of this beautiful planet we inhabit. All other labels are transient. In addition to writing articles, she contributes to The Lucid Guide with video caption translations for it's YouTube channel.